This book is answering such question as: 1) What types of difficult people we may encounter at work 2) How thy can harm us 3) How to deal with them. Author of the book - Muriel Solomon categorized many types of difficult people you might encounter at work. In order to make the book very applicable, she introduces each personality, explains why such individuals think as they do, how you are likely to react to their behavior, and what strategies you can use to protect yourself.

Author of the book - Muriel Solomon categorized many types of difficult people you might encounter at work. In order to make the book very applicable, she introduces each personality, explains why such individuals think as they do, how you are likely to react to their behavior, and what strategies you can use to protect yourself.

In a Personal Spat, Avoid Tit-for-Tat
Reacting with hurt and anger is only natural way when someone at work transgresses against you. But these emotions will keep you from thinking clearly, which is you most need to do when attached. Important point here ? keep the high ground when someone insults of browbeats you. Do not respond in kind as you always lose when you get down in the mud with an aggressor. Stay calm instead, plan a strategic response that will let you mitigate the situation and protect yourself against future attacks. Below you can find some of the many contentious personality types you many bump up against at work and to gain some ideas on how to deal with them.

Hostile People.
Angry people are burdened with numerous personal problems with makes them depressed and constantly streamed. They cannot feel good unless they make you angry as well. The best way to deal with an angry boss is to avoid losing your temper. Speak up for yourself. Use self-confidence and friendly manner to deflect and defuse your boss?s anger. Maintain your self-esteem. Maintain a professional attitude even if others don?t. Angry people love to argue. Don?t fall into their trap; stay cool, calm and collected. Demonstrate through your attitudes and actions that you want the employee to feel less frustrated at work. ?Angry workers? are less likely to trash the team if they feel ownership.
?Learn to stand up for yourself and express your anger in a positive way?.

Pushy People.
People who are pushy want to be liked, but because they insist on getting their way, they?re caught in a trap. If your boss is pushy, try to maneuver so he or she feels that your good ideas are his or her good ideas. This is just as important regarding your supervisors as it is regarding the people who work for you. Don?t let pushy subordinates bend the rules. Such people will try to get others to join in to subvert your authority. Head this off by being solicitous toward all of your direct reports. Be open and accessible.

Deceitful People.
Hypocritical people are always two-faced. They act positively toward you when you?re around, but try to sell you down the river when you?re not. Your goal is to get straightforward input in all of your dealings with dishonest people. Question them so they must provide direct answers. If you have a deceitful boss ask him or her to put any important work orders or concerns in writing or to announce them in public. That makes it difficult for the boss to wiggle out of a commitment. Deceitful colleagues will try to appropriate your good ideas, steal the credit and profit from your mistakes. Don?t confront with such liars, protect your valuable ideas. Try not to share them with people who will try to take them.

Shrewd People.
Manipulative individuals are seldom e forthright and above-board. They do their best to exploit you. Body language of such individuals will help you understand them. Is your boss a whip-cracking, exploitative person who will pile on as much work as possible? If so, insist on getting all your assignments prioritized in writing. Manipulative colleagues will do their best to shunt their responsibilities to you and to make you fell guilty for saying no. Learn to say no to manipulators! It may take some time to practice beforehand as many people find it difficult to deny others. For instance, you can try saying no in front of a mirror at home, or record yourself to see how you sound. If you come across as squeaky and timid, practice some more. When someone attempts to put you on the spot, ask hard-hitting questions to learn what your slick colleagues trying to pull.


Rude People.
Some people seem to go out of their way to be rude. No one else matters to them. They will walk all over you if you let them. They might ridicule and criticize you about your work, talk down to you or openly insult you. Never sink to such level when you deal with discourteous people. Carry yourself as a person worthy of respect. If you see such behavior coming from your boss, schedule a meeting to ask exactly what he or she hopes to have you do. You should explain that displaying such disrespect in the workplace is extremely inappropriate- and ask the boss to stop. If such behavior coming from colleague ? find out why, make it clear that you will not accept insults. Establish clear boundaries defining acceptable behavior. If a subordinate is openly defiant, have a conversation; get everything out on the table.

Egotistical People.
When dialing with people that convinced they are much better and more important than others, your natural tendency will be to expose their self-centeredness to everyone. This is a wasted effort because they will never change and you will make them your enemies. Egotistical bosses may ignore or discount your good ideas, they may brush you off if you approach them for assistance. Since egotists are self-contained universes, they can damage you only if you let them. If you have a healthy sense of self-worth, their snobbery and nose-in-the-air attitudes will come across as what they are ? silly and sad. Know-it-all colleagues or subordinates can be particularly aggravating. They often do have useful knowledge, so ask them about their information. Use penetrating questions that demand specific, quantifiable answers. Check what they say with your own independent research. However, do not challenge them in a direct or confrontational style. Instead, offer your own data in an objective, detached manner.

Procrastinating People.
People who put things off have self-esteem issues. Since they doubt themselves and fear making mistakes, they are reluctant to move ahead. Often they claim they do not have time to do more, but in truth they are frustrated and fearful that they can?t handle new tasks or might fail. Bosses who always put things off can drive their direct reports craze. The best way to handle them is to back off and quit pushing. Ask for a meeting only when you are confident that the boss is ready to discuss why he or she is being a bottleneck on your project, whether deliberately or not. Help your boss feel comfortable enough with you to speak openly. Ask nonthreatening questions in an indirect way. It?s important to pay close attention to the boss?s demeanor and body language; discern what he or she isn?t saying by reading the boss?s gestures, facial expressions and tone. You also might have trouble with perfectionist colleagues and subordinates who delay projects because nothing is ever good enough. Explain that the ?perfect is the enemy of the good.? Dawdlers are great fence-sitters and time-wasters. Help them become better organized. Establish firm deadlines with such slowpokes and do not waver. Use performance-based incentive programs. Teach your employees how to break a project down into manageable parts.

Rigid People.
Many bosses have a ?my way or the highway? attitude and are unwilling to follow anyone else?s suggestions. They become so controlling and immersed in minor details that they lose sight of the big picture. You cannot tell them anything, because they will not hear you. If you speak up, they immediately go on the defensive and later they hold grudges about your insubordination. To persuade rigid bosses, provide authoritative information that they can trust. Try to understand how your boss, with his or her additional responsibilities and concerns, views things; offer proposals with this viewpoint in mind. Pigheaded bosses are often determined to keep things on track even if the path leads straight off a cliff. With this type of boss, learn how to avoid being the recipient of direct instructions, but try not to seem insubordinate. Focus your efforts on solving problems that confront your boss. If your boss will not budge on a matter that you question, strictly adhere to his or her direct instructions but get them in writing. Document all your work to protect yourself.

Tight-Lipped People
Getting along with people who never speak is simply difficult. You have no idea how they feel. Maybe they?re taciturn because they?re taciturn because they?re contemplative and spend a great deal of time thinking before speaking. Or maybe they clam up because they?re afraid of saying the wrong thing. Warming up an uncommunicative iceberg boss is a tough chore. Try to establish trust. Show your boss that you are dependable and friendly. If your boss refuses to face things, try to find some way to get him or her to commit. Evaders dread confrontations, so explain your proposal or plan calmly, collegially and carefully. If the boss has no clear objections, proceed ? but only little by little.
Some subordinates are not only tight-lipped; they also have a habit of glaring at you like you stole something from them. Get such a person to dial down their hostile feelings by providing an opportunity for him or her to open up and tell you what is wrong.

Critical People
No matter what you do, you can?t please some people. Bake them a cake and they?ll be mad that you didn?t bring ice cream. Such individuals criticize other people all day long. They are always right; everyone else is always wrong. Your best strategy is to stay out of the way. If this is impossible, never criticize your boss directly. When the boss criticizes you, try to defuse the situation quickly by saying thanks for the ?helpful input?. Always pay close attention to the instructions and guidance that a critical boss provides. Fail to do so and you?re a dead duck. Show that you remain on the boss?s side despite his or her suspicions or accusations against you. Whatever you do, don?t attempt to bring things to a head. Leave your boss the psychological space to get back on your side once he or she cools down.

by Muriel Solomon
Copyright 2002 by Muriel Solomon
Used by arrangement with Prentice Hall Press, a division of Penguin Group (USA), Inc.
336 pages.